no more tears :(

Its been too long, I feel like lost in this
world..
With no one who could see me, no one
who cares, nobodys trying to help me out
of the pain I feel.. I was gloomy, too
much irritated.. Until someday I found
myself thinking.. Only me (myself) that
could make me feel happy, coz only me
who knows what I want, and I just wanna
make it by my own. I was so damned
idealist, egocentric, skeptical, and sort of
irrational sometimes. But I thought it was
the only thing I could do, to make me
stronger and survive in my fuckin life..
One day someone has come to my world.
I didnt know him at all, and I didnt know
why people were keep on trying to
influence me with their fuss, but I tried to
ignore them, coz I wanted to know
the real him by myself.
So, I tried to see him, getting closer to
know whats on his mind, his heart, and
his soul, then I convinced myself that hes
the one ..yeah the right one for me. We
had been fallen apart and we made
the promises in our heart..
I thank god for giving me the colors in my
life.. Erased all the blues.. and
successfully made my days so different!
By giving him into my life..
And I must confess, that I love him so
but love will always never be enough for
us we really need progress and more
time to make it all complete..
But everything wasnt going on smoothly..
and thought we were getting out of the
line..
Im sorry I was such a loser, maybe Id
been giving up too soon
But what am I supposed to say? Its really
hard to make a deal between my heart
and reality.The world doesnt belong to
me.. and Im hoping too much from this
world..
I knew that weve been so far apart.. And I
knew that hes fine there without me,
without thinking of me, without me on his
side.
But I dont know why he never sinks from
my mind.
He keeps hounding me in my thoughts
Never.. I never could erase him from my
mind
Once, Ive tried.. But it was just useless
Ive been trying to run.. Running from my
illusion.. trying to face the reality, but still
its too hard for me.. Im weak, too weak
for this..
But suddenly he came along .............
unpredictably...
I didnt know what it is..... Is it a miracle?
surprise? I dont understand..!
And he wanted me back.. and I wasnt
totally sure about that.. Was he drowning
in his unawareness? Or was he telling me
the truth? Its too vague..
Im trying to make it clearer, trying to
figure out whats inside his mind..
Does he really want me back? Or is it just
an easy-come-easy-go-crazy-decision?
Well....... I want to know!!! I must figure it
out!
But is it too late? Did I lose my chance?
He might have changed his mind.. He
might have forgot what he was saying..
Well.............. then
I decided to step backward. Maybe its no
use for me to moan over things that is
done, and hoping over things that will
never be a reality..
At last.......... I just wanna thank him for
everything..like the beautiful, and
splendid.. moments weve shared.. the
jazzy nights.. the coolest tie-break row
huh!...... and also the bittttter part of our
love story
I hope after Im telling him what Im
feeling,, I could go on my own way.. and
he goes on his way too..like he always do.
Finally, Its really..really...greaaaaat to
know him by my own point of view!

inget janji gelang ya der,bye